I have said that being around people who set a high-standard of performance is something I despise. Oh, wait. In 1995, I may have been that person. In fact, in both word and deed I was that person, walking down the aisle holding up the standard. I was the “Standard Bearer” leading my graduating class in to receive our diplomas at the SMU Cox School of Business graduation ceremony.
What happened to me? Here’s what happened: I was set free from a substantial lie: The lie that living up to a high-standard of performance somehow separates me from failure - it really just separated me from being known. And that is far more damaging than compromised performance because it’s compromised authenticity.
Setting a high-standard of performance was hell for me because the motivation for the performance was self-worth. Value. Fundamental Significance. I don’t want to live there anymore. I’ve been set free by the grace of God in Christ Jesus. He established my worth before I was born. He gives me value and significance - He sees me, all of me, and knowing the sinner that I am - He still chose to die for me, cover me and advocate for me to God - She is mine, He says.
And I say I despise being around people JUST LIKE ME, like I used to be and like I’m still capable of being because I’m afraid I’ll return to my old ways. I know the game. I hate the game, but I’ve been set free to grow the me designed and made by God.
Will I? Even if it doesn’t check off all the relevant cultural performance measures? How do I?
Paul tells me don’t despise others. He tells others not to judge. He says welcome one another, and not to prove you are right. Either one of you.
“As for the one who is weak in faith, welcome him, but not to quarrel over opinions. One person believes he may eat anything, while the weak person eats only vegetables. (this has cultural context and isn’t referring to actual current health scenarios)
Let not the one who eats despise the one who abstains, and let not the one who abstains pass judgement on the one who eats, for God has welcomed him.”
- Romans 14: 1-2
Jesus didn’t welcome me to prove he was right. He welcomed me because he loved me and wanted to be with me. And he invites me to welcome others, not to despise them for representing something which I despised in myself. But to prove him.